hey darlings,

guess what??

i published a new poetry collection!!

it’s called Reality, and it comes after my previous collection, Lost and Found! i published it in october, and it is super personal and honest and just . . . kind of angsty and to do with really dark shit.

trigger warnings: abuse, depression, self harm.

“forgetting them would mean losing a part of myself — the parts of me that have fallen away and come back together like a kaleidoscope of colours, blurring together and turning me into the person i am. fragments of early memories slip through my mind, pieces of a broken sailboat bobbing along the murky depths, driftwood washing to the surface in the inky darkness.”

REALITY is a rich and dark poetry collection, diving into the raw emotions and memories stemming from childhood to adolescence. every word is tinged with honesty and vivid imagery, language that shakes you to the core and keeps you thinking about it long after you’ve stopped reading. Sumaiya Ahmed’s second collection examines relationships: familial, platonic and romantic, and faith (or lack thereof) in god, survival, depression and heartbreak.

you can purchase it here if you’re in the UK and here if you’re in the US. there is also a kindle version too! 🙂

it’s up on Goodreads, which is something that still excites me! like i can actually say that i’m an author! a published poet! yaaaaaayy!

and this is one of my favourite poems from this collection — it’s called

god became a soulless being,
existence a questionable meaning.

she lost her hijab in defiance,
swapped prayers for condemnation,

deciding that if she was destined for
hellfire, hell, she might as well enjoy it.

she swallowed the sun that summer in ’16,
gleamed gold  and glowed heavenly.

she prowled the city, coming alive in the face
of sin, consecrating each sip of rum or whiskey or

vodka with hushed laughter. this was her unlearning
every holy lesson she’d been taught.

her doubt evolved from hurt, 
swallowing her faith in silence and

holding the flirtation with the devil between her teeth.
a bruised diamond boiled in her jaw,

late night laments for something more.
all the secrecy was only fun for a while.

losing faith meant living in exile,
but she lived that summer following

every rule she was told not to,
a haven for heaven, or maybe it was hell.

i hope you guys will be able to get the book and let me know your thoughts! i’d appreciate your support and feedback so so much ❤

sumaiya x

Posted by:Sumaiya Ahmed

my to-be-read pile increases every day and i aspire to be blair waldorf. or jacqueline carlyle. or olivia pope.

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