Mind your own business, bruv

You know, the funny thing about the South Asian community is that nobody knows how to mind their own business or keep their mouths shut. It’s not a hard concept to understand so I’m not entirely sure why they find it so difficult. For people who pride themselves on familial bonds, a close-knit community and being there for one another, man . . . these lot take the piss on a whole other level.

So this is @ the people in my life who can’t keep their mouth shut 🙂

Firstly, folks, I am Muslim and proud. I do however struggle with my deen — no Muslim is perfect and if you say you are, well, may Allāh reveal the truth soon about you ameen. The thing is yeah, having so many rules is hard but you know what? The beauty is within the struggle.

So suck yourself.

Secondly, committing zina. Ah how many people have had premarital sex, cheated on their wives or husbands? Go to clubs and flirt with other people whilst married? Drink or do drugs? Have had threesomes? Shall we get into that? Shall we talk about how many people have shagged their (haram) boyfriend or girlfriend before marriage? Ooh, there’s also people who lie about cheating on their partners too. And sadly, there are those assholes who can’t control their anger and raise their hand against their wives — let’s pray they suffer eternally. Let’s not forget the people who only stay in their marriage because they’re so stuck in cultural traditions and reputations, and to pass the time, decide to talk about other people. So shall we have a conversation about spreading gossip?

Yes I write articles, yes I have written things about my life for the world to see. Guess what? It is none of your business. For you to go and tell people who never would’ve known, thus stressing them out further and increasing blood pressure/making them sick? Well, for sticking an arrow into their back, one that would’ve missed them had it not been for you, so Insha’Allāh you suffer for that and your tv, fridge and cooker breaks. Also, since by extension this action you’ve done hurts me too, you’re not forgiven. Xoxo

Thirdly, my family’s aware of my man. Shock!

Fourthly, let’s discuss this culture.

It is built on the foundations of honour and Izzat and tearing down women for speaking their truth, even if they gain healing from it. In some ways, you are destroying that. It is really truly not difficult to mind your own business. The world will continue without flapping your mouth like a dog, barking away at nothing as if anyone cares about your miserable existence. Quite frankly, and let me make this clear: you ain’t shit. You know everyone answers for their own sins and mistakes. I will answer to mine.

It’s pathetic how you can’t function without being a gossipy aunt or uncle. What, your sex life that bad you have to make up for it by talking about things that have nothing to do with you?

You’re just making it harder on yourself lol by spreading stories and backbiting. Whether it is true or false, it is entirely unnecessary to be yapping away.

Man, I can’t wait for the day I never have to see so many people ever again. I have always always dreamed of the day I could leave and not come back to so many gatherings and events, because a lot of you are irrelevant. Nothing has ever been done for me. My parents yes and that is so appreciated, all the help, but this bullshit you’re doing now? How does that help anyone? But my point is, being in a community that doesn’t allow a woman to step out of the norm, without demonising and vilifying her, is disgusting and I hate it.

Hell I probably hate you too. Xoxo

Just get a life and stay the fuck out of mine pls. I cba for all this unnecessary drama when I’ve got ten thousand books to read.

Posted by

Sumaiya Ahmed is a freelance journalist and writer, aiming to break down the boundaries of cultural stigma and shame attached to mental health and sexuality within the South Asian culture, and bringing marginalised topics to light.

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