On dating someone outside my religion

[this is a snippet of my article for Hello Giggles which you can find here.] At the very start of 2020, I met the love of my life. From the beginning, I knew if the relationship blossomed into something more serious, the journey would be fraught with hardship, guilt, and a semblance of questioning where I stand…

Why I cried when my boyfriend bought me Ben & Jerry’s ice cream

[this is a synopsis from an article I wrote for Medium.] During the early days of my relationship with J, I was still in this haze of ‘pinch-me-I’m-dreaming’ because being treated with so much love, acceptance and wholesome kindness felt so unreal to me. I didn’t know what to do with all the love, all…

Communication matters

My attachment style has always been anxiously preoccupied, for as long as I can remember — from childhood to my teenage years and the first year of my twenties. Only since meeting J, has it changed to (about 51%) leaning more on the secure side.

Dating in a pandemic

When I first met my boyfriend earlier this year, I didn’t expect everything that followed to be so movie-esque. It all unfurled slowly, like the lead up to the conflict that inevitably transpires before the predictable Happily Ever After we all want, wish, and hope for. The search for a Happily Ever After sinks in…

How to recognise and let go of a toxic friendship

[This article was first written for and published on The Opinion Panel.] Relationships in all forms can be unhealthy, and breakups are hard. Everyone always discusses the heartbreak and unhealthy aspects that can come with romantic relationships, but we never talk about the platonic ones. This article is about toxic (unhealthy) friendships; how to recognise them,…

What I am learning dating a white man

For years, whilst learning and unlearning so many truths and the history behind not just my culture and my people, about the impact Britain left behind on Bangladesh, once part of India with Pakistan, I, in all complete honesty, wasn’t a fan of white people as a whole. Individual white people, I liked of course….

Not Any Less Asian

Around 4am this morning, i was reading “Dating out of your community does not make you less” by Aafiyah Shaikh, and it made me deep a few things really–like how me dating a white man can be seen as a betrayal of sorts to some people in my community, and to my ethnicity. Usually when…

Heal, Dammit, Heal

over recent years, something i’ve noticed is how some people tend to hold onto the hurt and betrayal caused by an ex. it’s something that’s so common, we’ve just become used to it. and we shouldn’t. your ex cheated on you? shit, mine did too.